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Lightning Fill In The Blank

PETER SAGAL, HOST:

Now onto our final game, Lightning Fill In The Blank. Each of our players will have 60 seconds in which to answer as many fill-in-the-blank questions as they can. Each correct answer's worth two points. Bill, can you give us the scores at this point?

BILL KURTIS: You're not going to believe this. Peter and Hari have two each, and Amy has four.

SAGAL: Oh, my gosh.

AMY DICKINSON: What?

(APPLAUSE)

HARI KONDABOLU: I do believe that.

PETER GROSZ: I believe that.

DICKINSON: Not possible.

SAGAL: All right. We have flipped a coin, and Hari has elected to go first. Fill in the blank. On Wednesday, blank was the only member of the GOP to vote guilty in Trump's impeachment trial.

KONDABOLU: Mitt Romney.

SAGAL: Right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: A new report shows that Illinois sold almost $40 million of legal blank in January.

KONDABOLU: Cheese.

SAGAL: No.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: Weed. On Thursday, prosecutors rested their case against disgraced movie producer blank.

KONDABOLU: Harvey Weinstein.

SAGAL: Right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: This week, authorities in Tennessee arrested a loan officer named blank for stealing over $50,000 in customer payments.

KONDABOLU: Thievery.

GROSZ: No, her name was Sarah Swindle (ph).

(LAUGHTER)

GROSZ: On Wednesday, Ponzi scheme mastermind blank requested an early medical release from prison.

KONDABOLU: Bernie Madoff.

SAGAL: Yes.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: A man in Utah is facing criminal charges after he was caught...

(SOUNDBITE OF GONG)

SAGAL: ...Blanking to get free hotel rooms.

KONDABOLU: Stealing.

SAGAL: No, he got free hotel rooms by releasing rats in the rooms and then complaining. Police have confirmed that the man executed the scam at at least three hotels but say it's likely he pulled it off at many more. He's been charged with misdemeanor fraud and felony having a really good idea. Bill, how did Hari do on our quiz?

KURTIS: Hari got three right, six more points, total of eight, puts him in the lead.

SAGAL: All right, very good. Peter, you're up next.

GROSZ: OK.

SAGAL: Fill in the blank. On Thursday, China announced they were relaxing blanks on $75 billion of U.S. products.

GROSZ: Tariffs?

SAGAL: Right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: On Wednesday, warehouse workers for online giant blank called on the company to improve working conditions.

GROSZ: Amazon?

SAGAL: Right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: This week, a cruise ship in Japan had to be quarantined after an outbreak of blank onboard.

GROSZ: Old people.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: Coronavirus.

GROSZ: Oh, right. Of course.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: Citing flagging sales, department store giant blank announced it was closing 125 stores over the next three years.

GROSZ: Gimbels? No, Macy's.

SAGAL: Macy's.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: Following his poor showing in Iowa, entrepreneur blank laid off dozens of presidential campaign staffers.

GROSZ: Steyer?

SAGAL: No, Andrew Yang. On Thursday, astronaut Christina Koch returned to Earth after a record 328 days aboard the blank.

GROSZ: Space station.

SAGAL: Yeah, the ISS.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: This week, two men were arrested after police...

(SOUNDBITE OF GONG)

SAGAL: ...Discovered a bag full of drugs labeled blank.

GROSZ: Drugs. Not drugs in quotes.

SAGAL: You were so close. But it was the bags were labeled, bag full of drugs.

(LAUGHTER)

GROSZ: It's like a half-point. Do we have half-points on this show?

SAGAL: The two men were pulled over for speeding and officers knew something was up when they both seemed incredibly nervous for a routine traffic stop. Oh, and, also, one of them was holding a personalized tote bag with, bag full of drugs printed on it.

GROSZ: (Laughter).

SAGAL: Apparently, that's what you get when you pledge a dollar a day to your local public weed dealer.

(LAUGHTER)

GROSZ: Do they have the "Memento" disease, where they have to, like, tattoo everything on everything?

SAGAL: Yes. Bill, how did Peter do on our quiz?

KURTIS: Four right, eight more points, total of 10. He moves into the lead.

SAGAL: All right. So how many, then, does Amy need to take this away from them?

KURTIS: Amy needs three to tie, four to win.

SAGAL: All right. This is for the game. Fill in the blank. On Sunday, the Arab League rejected President Trump's peace plan for blank.

DICKINSON: The Middle East.

SAGAL: Right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: Just before his impeachment vote, blank's approval ratings reached an all-time high.

DICKINSON: Donald Trump.

SAGAL: Right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: In retaliation over the city's refugee policies, the Trump administration announced it would no longer let residents of blank enroll in Trusted Traveler Programs.

DICKINSON: New York City.

SAGAL: Right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: New York state, actually.

DICKINSON: New York state.

SAGAL: But I'll give it to you.

SAGAL: On Sunday, the Kansas City Chiefs beat the San Francisco 49ers for their first blank win in 50 years.

DICKINSON: Super Bowl.

SAGAL: Right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: Best known for his roles in "Spartacus" and "Lust For Life," Oscar winner blank passed away at 103.

DICKINSON: Kirk Douglas.

SAGAL: Yes.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: The Tennessee state legislature made news this week when...

(SOUNDBITE OF GONG)

SAGAL: ...The legislator was seen drinking blank on the House floor.

DICKINSON: Is it bourbon instead of whiskey? Is it...

SAGAL: No, no. He was seen drinking chocolate syrup straight from the Hershey's bottle.

(LAUGHTER)

KONDABOLU: Respect.

DICKINSON: Where are they on the whole pot legalization thing in Tennessee?

SAGAL: They're not there yet.

DICKINSON: They're not there, OK.

SAGAL: Not there yet. Representative Kent Calfee was waiting for a speech to start, and he was photographed just in the act of taking a big, old swig from one of those plastic Hershey's chocolate syrup bottles. Now...

DICKINSON: Is that the one where you have to squeeze it? Oh, that sounds...

SAGAL: Yeah. Now, he insists he was not trying to acquire adult-onset diabetes. He was just super cheap. He says he uses the used and empty Hershey bottle as a water bottle. He said, quote, "I'm not going to buy, like, a $45 water bottle because I'd probably put it down and leave it somewhere." Then he adjusted the barrel he was wearing and went back to work.

(LAUGHTER)

DICKINSON: Wow, that's amazing.

GROSZ: Yosemite Sam was like, that guy is pretty embarrassing for the South.

DICKINSON: (Laughter).

GROSZ: That's ridiculous.

SAGAL: Bill, did Amy do well enough to win?

KURTIS: Well, she did very well. It's a close game this week. She got five right, 10 more points. And the total of 14 puts her in the winner's circle.

SAGAL: Congratulations.

(APPLAUSE) Transcript provided by NPR, Copyright NPR.